All posts tagged: marriage

My First Chinese Wedding

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A wedding is a must-attend to graduate in the understanding of a culture. A batch-mate at work took the plunge last night, giving me my first sneak peak into a Chinese-Singaporean wedding. Gate crashing The title’s a misnomer. It’s a Singaporean tradition in which the groom must earn the right to his bride. The groom, accompanied by his brothers (the western equivalent of the best man), shows up early in the morning at the bride’s house. They are greeted by the bridesmaids and tasked to pass tests on life’s essential skills (culinary, physical, endurance etc). Before the tasks started, all the brothers were made to sign indemnity forms! In this particular wedding, the tasks were considered rather mild, and included doing push-ups, decorating a cake, dancing & eating dumplings of 4 kinds – sweet, sour, spicy (stuffed with chilli) & bitter (boiled with panadol!) After completing all the tasks, the groom is given the key to his bride’s room where she waits in her bridal gown – rescuing the girl, Bollywood style 🙂 Tea ceremony …

I do?

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One of the side effects of turning 21 is that the word ‘marriage’ seems to be floating in the air, all the time. It makes people emanate all kinds of sentiments – obsession, fantasy, detest, and the most boring, acceptance. Lately, too many of my discussions with people revolve around the subject, and I hope this post is going to be a closure.  Given how rapidly our Indian culture has progressed, generation gaps are so glaringly obvious. Apparently generation gaps work in multiples of 7, and on some level, I have started to notice that. Anyway, this cultural progression seems to have been segregated by community, and some orthodox ones are still in the 20th century phase of arranged marriage, where girls are showcased to boys and only one-sided approval is necessary. I won’t address such an outrageously ridiculous custom here.  Recently however, I had a long debate with a friend who compares arranged marriages to Swayamvaras of history. The similarity is uncanny, if you think about it. Back in the day, suitors would line …

Marriage and Morals

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A CNN IBN buff, I’m waiting for 10 pm tonight to watch a CNN IBN showcase on India’s three generations and their take on marriage. It’s an initiative in countdown to India’s 61st Independence Day. Their preliminary poll claims that 82% of the Indian youth consider marriage an integral (read necessary) part of life. The study will explore social acceptance of divorce, live-in relationships and nuclear families. Mostly, until adolescent and puberty years, most people (children) tend to shun marriage and vow bachelorhood forever. As we come of age however, mindsets tend to change, mature if I may say, and magically enough, people seem to accept marriage as the next step in “settling down” in life. The next step to finishing schooling, starting a job and ensuring a steady stream of income. Well, I hope I’m not the only one who hasn’t been transformed by the magic yet. I’ve thought about it time and again, examined the concept, contested the logic, pulled my hair out. Always the same answer. No offense, but marriage to me …